Two listings found on Best of Craigslist (one hilarious, one beautiful):
Listing Number 1:
THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME ABOUT THE MUTATED SUBWAY ROACH ON MY LEG
Reply to: anon-11368183@craigslist.org
Date: Fri May 16 06:31:20 2003
Well…I took the V to 51st and LEX and transferred there to the downtown 6. The train was crowded as usual and I stood next to an old man with a tennis racket in a bag. I was reading a magazine so I ignored him as he moved his bag around from side to side…looking underneath and in it. I stopped reading when I heard him say “where did it go?”. A girl sitting near him responded: “um…brush your leg”. Realizing that she was talking to me, I looked down and saw a 2.5 inch cockaroach on my f%!@ing leg!!! I did my usual dance…brushed it off with my magazine…throwing the magazine on the ground…everyone on the train looked at me like I was crazy. I asked the girl if she saw it run away and she said “yes…you got it”. I sighed and bolted off the train at Grand Central, found my stairwell and my turnstile and rushed up the escalator to the front of my building removing my coat to check to see if it was still on me (even though the girl said I had gotten it…I did not see it run away MYSELF). SO I got into the elevator holding my coat over my arm…and looked down…and there she was…on the sleeve of my green coat. Even though two more people were on the elevator with me, I flung the coat on the floor, stood back and said “THERE IS A ROACH ON MY COAT!!!” The man who was sharing the elevator w/ me and another woman shook it off and killed it. I just finished the crying…but am still paranoid that there is something on me. I have considered going home for the day.
I am horrified of roaches. Thank you for pointing it out to me. And no thanks to anyone who saw me walking thru Grand Central w/ it on my coat...for not telling me.
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Listing number 2:
To the couple dancing on the platform of the L
Reply to: anon-5249212@craigslist.org
Date: Sun Aug 18 16:22:43 2002
you were white, she was asian, you were both tall, elegant, composed; your very presence on the dim, thick-aired platform imbued it with an air of accidental grace. you, ivy league-posterboy handsome, wore a black sport-coat over a white collared shirt, yet seemed miraculously devoid of sweat. her face glistened a bit, which only added to her loveliness.
a bit farther down the platform, a subway performer sang "somewhere over the rainbow," in pure, melancholy tones. you engaged her in an silly, impromptu dance, spinning her, pulling her towards you. she giggled deeply, your beamed. you were both so in love, a love so pure, so genuine, so removed from the base, sweaty, violent lusts and conquests of your average subway denizen (myself included) that i was overcome. with sadness, longing, joy? i'm not sure. all i know is that it restored my faith in humanity. thank you for the brief glimpse of transcendence on an otherwise wretched day.
How beautiful is that??
Recommended Tunes For Today:
+ Elvis Costello - Still
(makes me think of the dancing listing)
+ Willie Nelson - Somewhere Over the Rainbow
+ Isreal Kamakawiwo'ole - Panini Puakea
+ Death Cab For Cutie - Someday You Will Be Loved
+ Stellastarr* - Lost In Time
+ Bob Dylan & Van Morrison - Crazy Love
+ Elvis Costello - Lost In The Stars
Can never say no to a little Laurie
Listing Number 1:
THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME ABOUT THE MUTATED SUBWAY ROACH ON MY LEG
Reply to: anon-11368183@craigslist.org
Date: Fri May 16 06:31:20 2003
Well…I took the V to 51st and LEX and transferred there to the downtown 6. The train was crowded as usual and I stood next to an old man with a tennis racket in a bag. I was reading a magazine so I ignored him as he moved his bag around from side to side…looking underneath and in it. I stopped reading when I heard him say “where did it go?”. A girl sitting near him responded: “um…brush your leg”. Realizing that she was talking to me, I looked down and saw a 2.5 inch cockaroach on my f%!@ing leg!!! I did my usual dance…brushed it off with my magazine…throwing the magazine on the ground…everyone on the train looked at me like I was crazy. I asked the girl if she saw it run away and she said “yes…you got it”. I sighed and bolted off the train at Grand Central, found my stairwell and my turnstile and rushed up the escalator to the front of my building removing my coat to check to see if it was still on me (even though the girl said I had gotten it…I did not see it run away MYSELF). SO I got into the elevator holding my coat over my arm…and looked down…and there she was…on the sleeve of my green coat. Even though two more people were on the elevator with me, I flung the coat on the floor, stood back and said “THERE IS A ROACH ON MY COAT!!!” The man who was sharing the elevator w/ me and another woman shook it off and killed it. I just finished the crying…but am still paranoid that there is something on me. I have considered going home for the day.
I am horrified of roaches. Thank you for pointing it out to me. And no thanks to anyone who saw me walking thru Grand Central w/ it on my coat...for not telling me.
*
*
*
*
*
Listing number 2:
To the couple dancing on the platform of the L
Reply to: anon-5249212@craigslist.org
Date: Sun Aug 18 16:22:43 2002
you were white, she was asian, you were both tall, elegant, composed; your very presence on the dim, thick-aired platform imbued it with an air of accidental grace. you, ivy league-posterboy handsome, wore a black sport-coat over a white collared shirt, yet seemed miraculously devoid of sweat. her face glistened a bit, which only added to her loveliness.
a bit farther down the platform, a subway performer sang "somewhere over the rainbow," in pure, melancholy tones. you engaged her in an silly, impromptu dance, spinning her, pulling her towards you. she giggled deeply, your beamed. you were both so in love, a love so pure, so genuine, so removed from the base, sweaty, violent lusts and conquests of your average subway denizen (myself included) that i was overcome. with sadness, longing, joy? i'm not sure. all i know is that it restored my faith in humanity. thank you for the brief glimpse of transcendence on an otherwise wretched day.
How beautiful is that??
Recommended Tunes For Today:
+ Elvis Costello - Still
(makes me think of the dancing listing)
+ Willie Nelson - Somewhere Over the Rainbow
+ Isreal Kamakawiwo'ole - Panini Puakea
+ Death Cab For Cutie - Someday You Will Be Loved
+ Stellastarr* - Lost In Time
+ Bob Dylan & Van Morrison - Crazy Love
+ Elvis Costello - Lost In The Stars
Can never say no to a little Laurie
posted by (Headphones) at 3:20 PM
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